You’ve Been Cheated On. What’s Next?

First of all.

infidelity cheated on affair marriage couple wife husband adventure how to tips flirting hanging jealous relationship stalker romance internet facebook depression cheatingIf you been cheated on recently, let me tell you this: I’m really sorry, for real, I know how it feels.

Now, let me tell you a little story (very briefly) that happened back in 2008 when I was 18:

I had more than 2 years with a girl, I loved her, and we were ok, suddenly she changed her friendships, and her mood also changed, she changed her way of seeing life, her way of being, everything in her changed, she didn’t want to leave nightclubs (every weekend), she just wanted to get drunk and party over and over again, then I started listening to various gossips about her infidelities and I did not believe anything. Until I broke up with her to see if my decision would make her reconsider the way she was acting, but no, 5 days after she called me just to notice me that she already had a new boyfriend, I started researching (big mistake) and realized that her new boyfriend was actually the guy that she had been dating for months (when she was still my girlfriend). The experience shattered me.

 

infidelity cheated on affair marriage couple wife husband adventure how to tips flirting hanging jealous relationship stalker romance internet facebook depressionToday, 6 years later I can say “it was hard, but I got over it”; I recovered from the situation, deception and depression, and most importantly: I have left bitterness behind.

Unfortunately, infidelity is something that many couples live and will continue living, is not something new, some already realized and others never will. But for those who are going through this difficult situation I would like to share four tips that helped me out of depression.

For real; if I had read this post when I was 18 I’m pretty sure I would have taken less time to get over.

- I'm going to focus from the point of view of man cheated, but of course, 
these tips can also help a woman. -

 

  • Finish It (And Forever).

infidelity cheated on affair marriage couple wife husband adventure how to tips flirting hanging jealous relationship stalker romance internet facebook depression cheating finish break upLive your pain, feel it, there it is, and is not going anywhere soon, feel the anger, that anger can help you to get you out of this situation, don’t see it as an enemy, you’re on your right to feel this way, it is ok,  you need to understand how you’re feeling but it is much more important to say “We’re done”.

Are you going to continue dating a person who does not respect you? Say “Goodbye” and set a final point, close the cycle, to keep watching that person or worse: to give her/him a second chance, is just a clear sign that neither you respect yourself. Do not let that person to continue stealing more of your life time (precious time).

 

  • Do Not Investigate.

infidelity cheated on affair marriage couple wife husband adventure how to tips flirting hanging jealous relationship stalker romance internet facebook depression cheating finish break up catfish researchIf you already know you’ve been cheated on, leave it like that, don’t waste your time researching who is the other person, set yourself a rule: do not look at her Facebook, do not look at her Twitter account or any website where you can see what she’s doing, this will only destroy you even more.

And I understand that curiosity is like a stone that you’re carrying, but seriously, love and respect yourself a little more, and don’t investigate more than you already know, it’s over, say Goodbye and go on.

 

  • Travel.

infidelity cheated on affair marriage couple wife husband adventure how to tips flirting hanging jealous relationship stalker romance internet facebook depression cheating finish break up freedomWhen I stopped eating and didn’t go out with my friends anymore, my mom decided to send me a few days to another city with an uncle, the experience helped me a lot, he managed to distract me, they were days of drinking, meeting new people but especially days of reflection, when you’re away from your environment you realize that life goes on (in your city or wherever).

At the end you’re left with a feeling of freedom and independence that only a trip can give you.

 

  • Thank What Happened To You.

infidelity cheated on affair marriage couple wife husband adventure how to tips flirting hanging jealous relationship stalker romance internet facebook depression cheating finish break up catfish research singleI mean it, thank you lived that, I don’t mean to go with her (or him) and say “thank you for having been unfaithful”. Just… Thank to life or destination that you noticed, why? Because otherwise you’d spent more and more time with someone who really did not love you and did not respect you as a person, and now that you’re no longer with that person you can get on with your life and find someone better, someone that truly value you, someone who really love you, and when you find that person you will understand even better why was it better to have realized that you were cheated on.

I wish you all the best in this process, I know it’s hard but it was necessary, and it was the best thing for your life, so you can stop wasting time with someone who is not worth it, and… who knows? May be there’s someone out there that had been waiting you to be single again.

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Jesus Baray

I'm the creator of a One Man Band called Instrumentalism with over 70 instrumental covers on YouTube, recently gratuated from college, also certificated by Harvard as a Manage Mentor, what else does someone writes here? I'm married, dogs lover, spiders hater, movies fan, skinny handsome guy, I don't go to nightclubs I preffer an outside picnic, a live show, a party at home etc.

10 thoughts on “You’ve Been Cheated On. What’s Next?”

  1. I love to read a point of view of a man in this aspect, I wrote the same last week base on the point of view of a woman. Cheating and cheaters happened and temptation is part of any relationship. I guess it was made to test us as a person.

  2. it is hard to forget somebody who was so important in your life. the only advice i had for my brother when the same happened to him was to never waste a tear for somebody who least deserved it.

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