Important Wife-Skills for Ignorant Husbands

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How ready are you to become a husband?  Well, there is more to a relationship than just taking out the trash or belching with a beer in hand in front of the TV.  Oh yes, there are important aspects of a relationship that husbands need to know and understand.  Moreover, husbands need to follow religiously in order to survive being married.  Wife-skills are not about simply knowing your wife, these are skills and competencies that will turn you into a friggin’ useless lump of mass into a Class A man of the house.  Beware this is not for the faint of heart (or weak bladder control).  But if you love your wife you’d better put that remote control down and listen carefully.

Ditch the gender roles

One of the most important skills to learn is to ditch the gender roles that you’ve been memorizing your whole life.  Mom takes care of babies while dad focuses intently on organized male testosterone-filled competitions.  Nope, nope and nope! Taking care of the family is the responsibility of both parents.

Important Wife –Skill learning:

  • Learn to change diapers
  • Learn to give the baby a bath
  • Learn how to make your baby’s milk
  • Learn how to talk to children
  • Learn how to play with children
  • Acquire some child-discipline strategies – Giving an iPod to consume their time is not included here
  • Learn to be there for your family
  • Prioritize family over others – even if it means ditching poker night with your buddies
  • Learn to cook, do the laundry and most of all learn to clean the house

Of course this most important if you have kids.  If you don’t then great, you have a lot of time to practice.  So get off your butt and learn right now.

Ultimately, the whole point of ditching gender roles goes beyond merely doing mommy tasks.  It can be anything from doing the laundry to cooking food.  Believe me gender roles can strain the relationship.  When you have a life partner, there is no such thing as gender roles.  All you have are tasks that have to be done.  There no better way to say you love your wife than putting on an apron so she can just relax and take her time.  Do your share and put on the apron.

Mushy is good 

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One common misconception of being the man of the house is that you have to be tough.  Well, that is good until you fail to realize that relationships require opening up to your wife.  Of course there may be some apprehensions for just being all mushy.  But believe me your estrogen levels will still be controlled.

Talking with your wife about sensitive issues, emotional distress or some other “uncool” or “unguy-like” topics is important.  After all, a true guy can do anything.  Obviously I’m just working on your ego right now, but unless you realize the fact that you have a wife who is willing to talk to you communication might be very difficult unless you mushy up.

So go ahead open up and even shed a tear or two – I won’t judge.  Just remember mushy can be good.  Say it with me, Mushy Is Good.

A quick disclaimer here: Sensitivity is one thing, whining is another!  Please know the difference

Let her bask in the glory

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It is not all about you.  I know it can be difficult to swallow, but you have to understand that your ego is not as important as your love for her.  This takes some time to master.  Perhaps you can start small.  Let her hold the remote control for once.  Small steps my friend, small steps.

Allowing her to bask in the glory requires you to shut up.  I know that is quite a challenge.  But, letting her take the center stage allows her to share her mind.  If you think shutting up is a chore, now, you have to listen attentively to her.  I’m not talking about merely memorizing what she says.  Rather, it’s about deeply understanding who she is.

Here are some suggested skills your need to learn:

  • Shut up – yup that’s hard
  • Be supportive
  • Let her explore
  • Listen to her suggestions
  • Be encouraging especially with her endeavors

I firmly believe that men and women don’t have to be from different planets.  You know – Venus, Mars thing.  Instead, the differences are brought about by scripts we hold true for so long that it has corrupted our judgment and views.  This becomes detrimental when we talk about relationships.  Couples have to work together.  But here’s the clincher, we don’t have to wait for the other person to jumpstart this.  So I encourage every man out there to let it start with you.

Ultimately, when we sum everything that is written here it is all about getting rid of the egotistical and chauvinistic scripts we are so used to.  Our role as husbands and partners is all about synergy.  We fill up gaps that the other person may leave open.  And we strengthen our partner by encouraging improvements.  When we say yes to love we acknowledge our own imperfections and help each other grow stronger.

Love is that, which makes men brutes and brutes divine.

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jpcmc

I'm a proud dad and husband. Everything else is just life's clutter.

15 thoughts on “Important Wife-Skills for Ignorant Husbands”

      • i really love the title… seriously. Wife-skills? who could that term. what’s funny is ignorant husbands, which supported the wife-skills

        Reply
          • but you know I never saw my father cooked for the family, neither saw him cleaned the house. but we never felt this as offense. We just thought that he’s too tired working for the family.

            although I have 6 elder sisters. so maybe that’s the reason why. maybe when they were starting he also did some chores I just didn’t see it.

          • He contributes to the family in his own ways. what is irritating are some men who just do nothing, expect the wife to serve them after a hard day at work and worse, just uses the cash to drink and gamble.

  1. MEN=WOMEN . that is what the whole article is about. SO husbands, no more insisting that all you need to do is to work for the family. You need to KNOW everything that us, wives, do in as much as the same way as we know how to change tires, change busted fuse, paint the wall or do the plumbing.

    Reply
    • Being a team player in a relationship is important. Learning as much as one can will help build a stronger relationship. Responsibilities exists.

      Reply
  2. Very very good, @jpcmc:disqus! Hurray to that! True, husbands should learn some feminine tasks. And a true gentleman is the one that will do with all his heart all the tips you shared here. Your wife must be lucky because for sure you are doing those tips. And yes, I am lucky too because my husband does it too.

    Reply
    • I learned a lot of household chores even before I got married. Plus I don’t want my wife to do the icky stuff in the house from cleaning the toilet to the tiresome laundry.

      Reply

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