How to avoid SIBLING RIVALRY

Oftentimes, when you have more than one child, it is more likely that they would grow up competing for your love and attention. However, not all siblings grow up with that so called ‘rivalry’. Why? It is because their parents had handled them well and showed that everyone was equal and there was no favorite child. On the other hand, this is a very hard thing to do since sometimes; we do not recognize that some of our actions could start jealousy. Here are some tips on how to avoid sibling rivalry:

 



  • Do not COMPARE

It is a common line among parents:  “Take a look at your brother, he had done well. You should, too!” Keep in mind that your kids are very different individuals so you should not expect them to all walk the same path. Sometimes, we compare to encourage our other child to be inspired or do better but most of the time, it would make the other child feel bad about himself or herself if he/she have not achieved his goal.

 

  • Practice EQUAL SHARING

We tend to give more shares with the eldest or even the youngest child but this should be discouraged. Give everyone an equal share at first. If they require more, then give it to them afterwards. It is also a good practice to buy for all rather than for only one child. If it is required by the other child, always make it a point to explain why you would only be buying only one and reassure your child that in case he/she needs it too, you would also buy for them.

 

  • Spend an ALONE TIME with each of them

Set up a schedule where you can have some alone time with every one of them. This way you could catch up with your kids and you could hear their personal concerns too. There is always one child who wants to be with you all the time but you should split your time to also show the other kids that they are just as important.

 

Some parents admit to having a favorite child. However, this should not be a reason to start some grudge within the family. Some sibling rivalry could be destructive  and could overcome love so as early as they are still kids, make it a point to be mindful of your actions to discourage sibling rivalry!

 

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I am former contributor for Bayanihan News Australia and currently a part-time blogger/writer for different websites. I also teach English to Korean and Chinese students online. But most especially, a proud mom of three. ^_^

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11 thoughts on “How to avoid SIBLING RIVALRY”

  1. Sometimes, sibling rivalry only happens when a parent would let one of her child feel that one of her kid is better than the other. There should always be equal treatment among kids.

  2. These are very helpful tips. I’m a middle child and I know sibling rivalry first hand. I have the scars to prove it. LOL Parents really have to do an excellent job when it comes to giving all their kids ample attention.

          • But the good thing is, when we grew older, it was no longer felt. Thank God my parents brought us up real well.

          • I know people who still hold on to the past like it was the reason for their failures. Quite a few like you learn from the past and actually move on. Moreover, sharing the dismal experiences with others so that they too can learn from one’s burdens is quite a commendable attitude.

  3. I am the eldest and as expected I am always the one who understand and give way but sibling rivalry can’t be avoided especially for 12 kids. But my parents always assured us that there love were equal among us.

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